Why I am going to Hell for Today's Win and Fail

Actually, no one who survived a life like mine has a lot of belief in religious structures like Hell except here on Earth, or in God except as some enormous wry cosmic comedian.  That being said, I know I am a bad person for today but I honestly don't care, it was still funny. Besides, I've been told a lot I have a face for radio and it's brutally true so we can't all be some mother's pretty child. One thing I used to do for fun that was easy for me, probably because of my hyperflexibility weirdness, is to cross one eye, casually, in class, and look over at a classmate without warning to crack them up. It always worked, better than wiggling my ears, and less likely to get me busted than making my boobs bounce by working my pecs singly.
Anywho, I was reluctantly holding down a very uncomfortable seat in the auditorium of Day Two in Purgatory: Or, Nursing Orientation for People Who Do Not Give a Flying Fuck. They pried the Power Point clicker out of the HBIC's hands and had her run a video instead. Oh, thrilling. Entertainment.
 Now, this is a national company who was running the blurb, mind you. but the production values were resolutely local. The camera was definitely in too tight on the Caesar-haircutted talking-head host, who was explaining to us why we would cost the hospital a ton of money if we let the doctors and families throw procedure box wrappers and pizza boxes into the red Hazmat bio-bag trash bins. They entertainingly intercut his lecture with shots of longsuffering black men in Hazmat suits digging through redbags, separating soda bottles and bloody washcloths from pus-soaked sponges. The win plus fail part? The talking head guy, although moderately attractive despite his tragic haircut, had one feature that kept any of his lecture from hitting home with his audience. Every time the camera zoomed in on him and he looked into it, his left eye looked DIRECTLY AT HIS NOSE.  It was like a Monty Python skit. The girls in back of me kept snorting. The camera would zoom in, his right eye would be visible and the left one would go to white, the black guys would find something else nasty or ridiculous, and it kept happening for about ten minutes. There were credits that rolled at the end, go figure. Someone put her name on that.