The Good, the Bad, and the Ridiculous

So memaw car got out of car hospital after a week. She looks awesome; not only did she recover fully from being run over by the damnfool next door and losing a turnsignal headlight thingie, she got herself one helluva bath. I do not know when I have had this car this clean. She got some gradoo (local patois for gross shit you don't know the origin of or proper removal method for) all over her a while back that wouldn't come off with any solvent from the Auto Zone. Taking her to the carwash just made her a little less gritty. I thought either the pecan sap or the Central Valley funk from when I lived in California had etched the paint. Lemme tell ya; this is one shiny old car. She and I are prissing ourselves up the onramp to go to the fitness center and finally sign up. On public radio comes Clark's Trumpet Voluntary. I recessed to this at my wedding, and it's a gorgeous piece of music. Problem is, hearing it makes me feel like I did at my wedding; so happy when I first turned around, a little nervous when I saw the odd expression on my new husband's face, and devastated by the end of the piece; by the end of the aisle, I could tell he was done. As far as he was concerned, his part was complete. That attitude did not change for the next five and half years that we were married.  Honestly, that rat bastard ruined one of the prettiest pieces of classical music ever for me. I'm just glad we didn't recess to Pachelbel's Canon in D.
I shook that ghost off and cruised on into the fitness center. They signed me up and I padded into the pool area to walk the pool, determined to walk 30 minutes in the water. Ha. As if. I made it about two lengths up and back without getting winded. Slow walking, let me emphasize here. I did spend 35 minutes in the pool. Some of it was walking with my arms going back and forth in the water. Most of it was either walking with my arms on a boogie board TO LEAN ON in the water. Or if that got TOO HARD, floating up and down the lanes with some kicking. Please. Meanwhile there was a steady stream of little old ladies almost twice my age pulling on rubber caps, getting in the lanes next to me, swimming laps and smoking  me. I got smoked by someone's MiMi seven times. Panting the whole way. With a cramp in my right leg. Afterward I spent twenty minutes letting the whirlpool show that leg cramp who was boss. Ha.
The ugly part is where I forgot my brush so when I dried my hair it was way past scary even with a ponytail; then when I got to the drugstore the line was too long to drive through so I said fuckit and went in looking like that. Scared a couple of people out of a year's growth.